Why Type A People Loathe Hearing “It Happens When You Least Expect It”

Words and phrases have power and energy.  They are conceptual units of language that convey meaning and provide information to those that receive it as advice.  The love cliché, “It happens when you least expect it” for all its good intents and purposes of being advice, isn’t really good advice.  In fact, I loathe it.  

I am a 42 year old happily single woman and I have received this advice from friends, family, overly nosey coworkers, and even the checkout clerk at my local grocery store.  This clichéd advice on my romantic future typically does their ego more good to say it, than it does mine to hear it.  When I hear, “it happens when you least expect it”, my reaction is similar to wanting to punch that person in the face.  And please don’t tell me to “just stop thinking about it” either, because I am a thinking person and I enjoy thinking.  While I understand that this personal reaction is in part due to my type A personality wanting desire for control and power to say STFU, I will admit there is a buried element of spiritual gold in this statement, however, it’s not what most people think.  

As a spiritual scientist who believes in the fundamental magical energy behind elements and compounds, and as someone who likes to analyze data, let’s analyze and feel into the energy of the words in the statement, “It happens when you least expect it”.  

Table 1.  It Happens When You Least Expect It

Word  (Elements) Meaning  (Compounds)
ItA relationship
Happensto become real in the world, to take place
You a delightful being of presence, hope, and love
Least Smallest in amount, minimal, rare, unimportant
Expect to strongly hope/believe, look forward to something
ItA relationship

The data suggests:

“A relationship will become real and will happen at the time you have small hopes and beliefs for getting it.”  

Blah, not great dating advice or very inspiring, is it?   This advice is actually crippling to success!!  

Let’s dig a little deeper…..

Least is next to nothing, minimal, unimportant, and inappreciable.  It is a feeling of insignificance, like a small trivial piece of life that rarely comes into consideration or importance.  To expect something or having expectation is the opposite.  It is a quality of believing strongly in something, to imagine and have hope for the future and to anticipate and count on it happening.  

No wonder this is frustrating, there is a paradox imbedded directly in the piece of advice.

Forgive me for stating the obvious, but wanting something means you expect it.  Being successful in anything means you have intention, motivation, and desire to work towards achieving it.  The Law of Attraction dictates that whatever can be imagined and held in the mind’s eye is achievable.  Envision, hold the feelings of what it would be like to have it, and then take action while letting go of the outcome.   The “when” of the statement is actually the spiritual gold.  The timing of events isn’t up to you, but you can set yourself up for success while you wait.  

I invite you to take these 3 easy steps to start letting your energies flow wildly, so you can live without stress and you bring to you what your heart most desires!  

  1. Maximize (not minimize) your personal power.   This one is important because it is reinforced by what we already know from science.  In physics, the definition of power is the rate at which work is done over time.  Work is defined as energy you put into something, so maximize your personal power by amplifying your energy now!  Claim what you want as already yours.  Write it out in your journal, feel it, and affirm this to yourself as often as possible.  It is okay to own it and say it out-loud!!  
  2. Continue to expect it and daydream about it.  Daydreaming or envisioning helps reprogram your mind and move old beliefs out of the way.  When you keep your eye on the prize, living your life full of hope and optimism that the thing you are thinking about will come true, is what it means to be successful in pursuit of your goals.  Success is built upon the practice in the moment when you are living your awesome life as awesome you, without fear that what you want hasn’t happened yet.  Instead chose hope and trust that it WILL happen and is on its way to you.  Yes, be expectant, because you’re expecting that eventually it’s going to work out.  
  3. Trust in Divine Timing.  As you change your routine, take a new route to work, go on vacation some place new, or join a new group, it causes your energy to relax and open into a new activated part of your destiny.  Taking new action with the belief that what you want is already possible, your insight and inner guidance will be that much stronger to continue to move you in the right direction.  Doors will magically open and new opportunities will show up out of thin air at the right place at the right time.  Letting go of the outcome is key because outcome is defined as: the final product or the end result, both of which implies….. timing.  

The data concludes the when is the spiritual gold to this entire cliché.  It truly is all about timing.  Don’t let the timing distract from your goal.  Just because it hasn’t happened yet, does not mean it is not going to.  

I want to help you understand that divine timing is trusting that events happen as they are supposed to.  It is the moment you are ready, in right place at the right time, in order to clearly reveal to you in tangible, visible form what you want.  This is the magic of manifestation.

It’s not about least expecting it, it is about allowing the energies within you to flow and help you be open and ready to attract what your heart most desires. 

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Jenn Maronek

Nurse | Blogger | Coach | Author


  1. Helen Drummond Maronek on July 16, 2019 at 12:58 pm

    Let’s see if this time works to post. .
    Amazing. Great blend of science and spirit. I’ve seen the divide through my life and seen the blending slowly erase that division. You’re doing it.

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